April 5

My Day

Morning – Lecture notes didn’t load

Der Diary! Today, I had another un-usefull day. At least, in the beginning. So, I slept until like 11am (a bit late for my taste) and then, I had initially planned, to study some for today. But that’s where the problem arose. That is: My lecture notes on my tablet didn’t open. I tried it (more or less passively) for about 1.5 hours, but it just doesn’t work. Really annoying.

Afternoon – Gym & BBQ

Then, at like 2:45pm Josh called, because we planned to have a small BBQ with Yanis. He also (at the time of the call) just left the gym with his girlfriend. Then we said: Meet at his place at 4pm. Then I also asked, how many people were in the gym, and since only 1 person was there, I also speedran a gym-session.

I trained only like 3 different things, but each with 2 warm-up sets, and then 3 “real” sets. Today it was: 1. Squad; 2. Low Row; and 3. Bicep curls. Also, once I was done, I quickly went on the treadmill and walked backwards for some time, since this is quite good for your legs. (With which I obviously have some little problems…)

Once I was done with that, I went home, helped my father lubricate his bicycle-chain and then took a shower. But I showered with somewhat cold water. For one, so it takes less time, and other, so I sweat less (which I at least think it does help). Then I left the house at like 4:15pm.

I was on my bicycle heading to Josh, and then he called me and said: “I have to go pick up my girlfriend at her place, but my mom knows you’re on your way. So you can just go into our garden.” Damn! I was still to early. So then I drove really slow the rest of the way to his place, and (awkwardly) waited there for like 2minutes. Then, his father also saw me, and called me by the wrong name… Worst case scenario. I hate when something like this happens! Of course, I didn’t correct him(?). I just didn’t know, how to say it.

None the less, once Josh arrived, we set up some chairs and the grill outside. Then we prepared some vegetables & garlic bread for the grill. During this, also Yanis arrived. So we were now complete. We then sat outside, had a few beers and talked a lot. Nothing “important” but it was fun none the less. A good afternoon. It was also like 20°C without any clouds – really nice.

Feeling Happy / Complete

During this evening, I had once again this feeling of completeness or happiness. Well, it wasn’t really “happiness” more just like “this is all I want / need to make me happy”, but not in the sense, that I was just smiling. More a fulfilling feeling. You know what I mean (I hope).

Evening – Driving Around

We then grilled, ate a lot and spent some more time outside. After some time, it started to get cold, so we were wondering, where we should go. We then decided on going on a quick drive. Since Yanis didn’t drink, he drove. We just drove around a bunch, and talked some more in the car (obviously).

Once we were back, Josh and his girlfriend showed us some “secret spot” they had, called “the sex mountain”. Which, as the name might tell you, is a spot on a mountain, where not a lot of people get to, but has a nice view. Now during the day, it is way to open, but in the night, pretty much no-one will ever go there. So it’s a good spot. You also have a nice view over the “valley”, where we live.
When driving back from there, we went over some of-road streets. Since the car isn’t that high, we even scratched its bottom with the ground – nothing broke, luckily.

After that, Yanis went to the train station (because he didn’t want to drive home with his scooter) and then Josh drove the last like minute of the “trip”. (This was not too bad, since we only had like 7 beers over ~5-6 hours.) Once back, I too went home, watched some YouTube, and now I’m writing (to) you!

How Often Do I Think of my Ex? – pt.2

Unrelated to all that: I wrote yesterday, that I asked myself, how often I think of my ex. Today, I payed better attention to that, so I can say: It’s way more often, than I thought. Now, it’s not bad, but when we were talking, and grilling, I realised, all of this has some memories “connected” to her. So I thought at least like 10 times this evening. Or when seeing Josh with his girlfriend, asking myself if I made the right call, since now I’m single and I’d like that too…

Also, each time, I go to a place near where she lives, I hope 2 things. For one, that I don’t see her, and two, that I do see her. Which obviously makes no sense. It’s more like, I’d like to talk to her again, but also it’d be really weird, and painful (probably). So I’d also rather not do all that. You probably know what I mean(?).

Progress?

Somewhat related to that: Today was a day, where I thought, I might make myself a tinder profile, and see if I get a new girlfriend. Of course, I didn’t do it, but I was motivated to do it, which was like the first time in like a really long time. So I guess, this is some progress. The next girlfriend may come soon!

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So that’s all for today! I’ll see you again tomorrow! Bye-Bye!