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Hi! Apparently, yesterday I forgot to write my diary lul. Nothing special happened though, so it’s no biggie.

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22nd

Morning as usual. In the afternoon, I did have to go to university for my bachelors thesis seminar. There, 2 PHD-students held a presentation about their current work.
The first was about graph-edit-distance (which is basically “how much operations you need in order to get graph G to G’ “). This one was more interesting, but I didn’t understand all of it.
The 2nd one, was about predicting river temperature based on air temperature and maybe find some hidden patterns. But this was quite boring, ngl.

After that, I went back home, helped Emily cook, and then after dinner I had volleyball practice. Since my left knee really hurt (on Tuesday too btw) I was only the coach for this session. It was good for the players though, since I could really focus on them for once.

Once practice was over, I showered, went home, and that’s about it.

Though, I did have a really hard time falling asleep. I had a really dry throat, and had to cough a lot. Also, I did wake up like twice in the night. :(

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I did (kinda) really get back on hinge. I sent out all of my likes. Also, Josh said once, that I was too picky, but this time I don’t think so. My current push is quite good. So it doesn’t take me that long to send out all of my 8 daily likes.

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23rd

I slept kinda long (~10:30), since I had a hard time falling asleep. But today I didn’t really do anything. I cheated my internet-blocker in the afternoon, since I didn’t want to do math, and I have already solved all of this weeks Sudoku (lul).

In the afternoon, my parents new car arrived. Then, we quickly had to go pick up the Twingo, since they left it somewhere. Directly after that, I did go for a quick grocery shopping with Emily, since I had to cook today.

Once we got back home, we already started cooking (it was about 16:45). We made Pizza – something, everyone likes!
We did test 2 different kinds of cheese. One was just basic Mozzarella, and the other was some Pizza-cheese-mix. (4/5 preferred the Mozzarella, since it wasn’t as dry.)

After dinner, I spent some more time on my PC -> shower & now I’m here writing this.

That’s about all for today. I’ll see you again tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

Hi! First, a bit about yesterday evening. As I took a nap in the afternoon, I couldn’t really fall asleep. Though, I was tired, but I still couldn’t fall asleep. And my mind was going back and fourth about my relationship with my ex (as kinda mentioned before).
Then, it progressively got worse and shit. Then I took at the pictures of my ex and me together (since I didn’t really delete them off of my phone), and then I realized, that we weren’t really dating for that long (only 9 months). Which, oddly enough really helped. But yeah, after trying to fall asleep for about 1.5 hours, I did manage to.

Oh, also, yesterday evening, I was quite sad, so I did listen to sad music. To fit the vibe – you know. (It’s always a risky business as commonly known by me.)

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Today morning: I had to get up kinda early (7:15) and then go to university. I did still listen to a bit of sad music, but it was manageable. I had some lectures, and solved some exercises. Then, it was already time for lunch.

Lunch: It’s quite sweet, the others ask every week about my Porsche, and how it’s going. It’s basically the number one conversation shifter, and basically everyone hopes that we solve it soon lul.

After lunch, we played 3 rounds of geoguessr, and then I solved some more exercises. Then, we all went to a grocery store before our afternoon lecture.
At first, I didn’t want to go, but then they asked me to join them, so I did. (I was really happy, that they asked me to join them.) I didn’t buy anything though. In the store were self-checkout thingies, and I just walked through there (since I didn’t have anything to pay for). As I was waiting at the exit, one of my friends jokingly asked me, if I had scanned all my things (a worker from there was just standing next to us) and I replied with “no, I stole everything” while looking at the worker. She actually did find it quite funny, so she didn’t check me. lol.

Then, lecture -> back home -> spend some time doing nothing -> dinner.

After dinner -> spending some time on YouTube (during this time, I quickly helped Emiliana with finding someone to help her – no, it’s not me) -> shower -> now I’m writing (to) you.

That’s about all for today. I’ll see you again tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

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My hinge date did just reply to me as I’m writing this. She didn’t reply the whole day, so I was kinda hoping, that she’s gonna ghost me.
Justification: Yesterday, she did send me a video of her “favorite” local “poetry slammer”. And it was kinda whack. Some politics type shit. Big minus, not gonna lie lol. Also the end was kinda depressing -> wtf, why?

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Theory time: You know, yesterday I thought, that I’m gonna become depressed? I didn’t (actually, it got better) and now it’s my time for a theory.

You know, when you have a song stuck in your head and can’t get rid of it? What to do then? Listen to the song, so actually finish it in your mind, then it (usually) leaves it.
So now, for me, with my sad-being, I think I “fixed it” (avoided it getting worse / improved it a little) by taking a look at the pictures, and then (sorta like with a song) going through it all in my head, including the end.

And yesterday, this did actually get me out of the loop / spiraling. So I think you have to do shit like that… Or at least, that’s a possible way.

Hello! I think, I’m about to become depressed lul. Maybe, it’s just, that I didn’t sleep that much, but yeah. Today was another “sad” day. Still because of Daniel talking to my ex.
Well, more precisely: Close friends of me spending time with her makes me sorta feel, like I made a mistake breaking up with her. And this is only partially the mistake of Daniel, since Yanis’ GF Leah also did meet her (as I told you once already) and they “got along really good”. So yeah, because of that, I’m pretty much spiraling like an idiot.

Anyway: What did I do today? Not that much. Got up kinda early (8 o’clock) had a nosebleed, which nearly made me miss my train to the university. I had my AI seminar. Today’s paper was about ARC (once again) and about test-time-training. Which basically means, that you fine-tune your model on the examples you get in the test-question. But all in all, not that interesting.

After that, I went back home. At home, I ate a little old bread for dinner, and then in the afternoon, I did fine-tuned BERT for my bachelors thesis (with like 50 epochs -> didn’t really make it better) and took a nap during this time.

Once I got up again, I solved some Sudoku -> Dinner -> Volleyball practice.

We were 12 people, so that was kinda fun. But my shoulder and left knee really hurt. So that’s no good. I think, that from now on, I’ll play libero until Christmas-break, and then I’ll quit the playing part, and focus on coaching. So that’s no good too :(

That’s about all for today. I’ll see you again tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

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I’m currently texting with one woman on hinge, but as my mental state is not that well atm, I’m not really interested. Which is a real shame. But yeah – it is what it is. I don’t know if I should “break up” this match or what to do…

Hello! Today I did nothing. Spent the whole day watching things on my PC. Also, today was better in terms of hang-over. I didn’t have any at all. This was kinda surprising, but we take it!

Also, I was / am still kinda pissed at Daniel for talking so long with my ex yesterday. I can’t really put it into words, but you know, it was kinda weird.
Also, since she congratulated me on my birthday, but yesterday when I said “hi” to her, she just looked away. So I (obviously) took the hint, and left.
But since today is the day after, this was the only day that I’m allowed to be pissed about it. (Because the rule is: It’s okay to be mad on the next day – but no more than that, since it wasn’t really anything bad.)

Yeah, that’s already nearly all. In the evening, I got kinda tired, got into my bed, but then immediately un-tired myself. So I then downloaded bumble, and tried this a little. I actually already saw three people I know there. Funny times.

After that, I took a shower and then I had planned to read the paper for tomorrows seminar, but I didn’t. Well, I read a quick summary but no more. And now I’m going to bed. So I’ll read it tomorrow.

That’s all for today. I’ll see you again tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

Hello! Today, I woke up perfectly fine. Kinda unexpected, not gonna lie, but we take it. Then, I had to go shop some things for our car (some container for gas and a pump to get it out of the tank). Oddly enough, I started to get a headache which grew and grew over time.

Once we were back home (about at 10:10), at home, my family was sorting out things to throw into a junkyard (since it’s the last Saturday with the big car at home, before we get the new). Jordan and I put some things in the car, and in the end I had to accompany my mom to the junkyard. (It was only like 10 minutes from home, so no big deal!)

After that, I had lunch, and then it was already time for Josh’s inline hockey playoff game. It was actually the final (at least I thought like that, but they got another game tomorrow?). Our whole “inner circle” went. It was somewhat amusing. I’m not even gonna lie, I zoned out quite often during the game lol.

About the game (three thirds of 20 minutes):
1/3: Josh’s team was behind 2:1
2/3: Josh’s team was behind 4:2
3/3: They started behind, got one goal shot against them, but then they turned up like mad. They were down 5:2 but then they shot 5 more goals. (And it got kinda heated, so they nearly beat each other up that’s the whole goal!)
So in the end, they did win. Proud!

After that, I went home, had like a 30 minutes break, and then had to leave for the volleyball “party” thingie. Funny story: Daniel and I both missed the train we had planned to take, so it ended up matching perfectly lol.

At this thing, we mostly spent our time with Emiliana, her best friend, and the both of us. Most of the time it was quite amusing – though, time didn’t pass by fast at all not gonna lie.

Some things that happened:
1. Emiliana told Daniel and I, that she was kinda mad at us, since we never went by her place, rang her doorbell and asked her to come walk outside (or whatever). Which (no cap) was kinda surprising.
2. Daniel and I went there as a group of two. So we pretty much did everything together. But one time, Daniel started talking with my ex, who was there too. During this time I waited for Daniel, since I did not expect it to take that long. After 10 minutes, I thought, okay, maybe they got a lot to talk about. Another 15 minutes later, it got kinda sus. And another 15 minutes later, it got annoying! He ditched me to talk to my ex smh!
(During this time, I went to bring him his smirnov, I said “hi” to my ex, but she stared in the other direction, so I got the message, that she did not want to talk to me…)
So after all this time, I went to some different friends. (Funnily enough, Emiliana asked me, if I was allright, since Daniel ditched me, so I wasn’t the only one to notice. So what do you say now Daniel?!)
And then I made some bad jokes, and shit, (not gonna lie, I wasn’t 10/10 okay with that, since it was that long) but yeah. It obviously isn’t that terrible.

Then, Louis drove me home, and we talked some in the car.

At home, I took a shower, and now I’m writing (to) you. I’m quickly gonna watch some YouTube, eat a little bit and then go to bed. That’s about all for today. I’ll see you again tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

Hello! As I’m writing this right now, I’m a little drunk, so sue me for some chronological inconsistencies – or don’t!

Day: During the day I didn’t do jack shit. Though, I helped my mom cook for dinner. Otherwise, I just spent some time on hinge, read some things for my bachelors thesis and that’s about it.

After dinner, though, Jordan and I did some work on our Porsche. We did manage to open the upper end of our fuel tank. And let me tell you, shit’s quite full. We first thought, that we didn’t have any fuel in it, but we do.
After figuring this out, we did also check, if we got any gas up front in the engine, but we don’t. So our problem lies somewhere between the tank and the engine. Which is a really good thing for us.
We have already ordered a new fuel-pump and gas-filter for our car, so that’s the next thing we gotta fix! But after that, I expect the car to run!

At like 22:00, We quit the car part for today and I went overe to Petes. We just drank some beer, played some card games, some chess, and talked quite a lot. It was honestly quite amusing. I then got home (really late) at 2:45 -> took a shower (I’m not gonna tell you how long) -> and now I’m writing (to) you . So now I’m going to bed (it’s currently 3:35).

That’s about all for today. I’ll see you again tomorrow. Take care & I’ll see you then! Bye-Bye!

Hello! Today was my birthday. How exciting!

So how did I celebrate? I didn’t really. I mean, during the day, I was just studying (in the morning at least, after that, I didn’t have anything more to do, since I was already done with everything) or spending time on Reddit (since it wasn’t blocked yet).

Here in my family, the person who’s birthday it is, can wish one meal. I wished some classic rice with a ham-tomato-sauce. Funnily enough, my mom prepared most things, but I still had to cook the rice. During this time, most of my siblings got home and all of them noted, that it was kinda funny, that I have to cook my own birthday-dinner. (It wasn’t even that good lol. I failed!)

After dinner, I just spent some time on YouTube -> shower -> now I’m writing (to) you.

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Who congratulated me (a.k.a. ranking of my best friends mhm):

1. Emily (early in the morning, since she gets up early)
2. Mom (same reason)
3. Volleyball woman friend (7.7. birthday andy – at about 10 O’clock)
4. Her boyfriend
5. Pete
6. My ex (at about 11:20)

-> Lunch

And then some more. I found it kinda funny, that the people I consider my “close” friends, didn’t really congratulate me early. (I know, this makes no difference, but still.) In the end, they all did. Also, Daniel noted yesterday, that today was my birthday, but he didn’t say anything, until in the evening. I could have made a bet, that he’d forgotten already haha.

–> So my ex did congratulate me, but she did not initiate any small-talk, which I guessed might happen. (At her last birthday, (December 8) I did start some small-talk, but it didn’t really lead anywhere, so I was wondering if she’d attempt it too.)

–> Pretty much all the people I hoped would congratulate me did. Which is always nice!

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Other weird thing: This afternoon on reddit, I stumbled upon r/gonewild – which basically is just porn. So then I watched some -> jerked off to porn. (I made an exception to my no-porn-rule since it’s my birthday.)
Also, in the evening, I jerked off once more. Unc’s still young. I’ve still got it in me! (And some I do no longer have in me, if you know what I mean hehe )

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That’s about all for today. I’ll see you again tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

Hello! Today I slept out – super cool! I did wake up at around 10, and then solved some numeric coding exercises. After that, it was already time for lunch.

After lunch, I did some more work on my bachelors thesis. I did correct the remaining sentences because of which, I now have ~2000 sentences, to fine-tune BERT on. This took really long, basically the whole afternoon.

And then it was time for dinner.

After dinner, I did have volleyball practice, though, since it’s now winter, we have the gym from 21-23:00. So I left home at about 20:15 which meant, I had my internet blocker removed and watched some YouTube.

Practice was alright. We did loads of jumps, and now my left knee hurts a little. Real annoying. Also, my shoulder did hurt once more. So this most definitely is not fixed, even though, I hoped it would be…

After practice, I drove Daniel home, and myself too (obviously). The way home from Daniel on, has a 2km long straight stretch, where I did try to put on a certain song. (I just had to skip and rewind, but old car -> bad UI.) While doing that, I obviously didn’t pay perfect attention to the road. Then, out of nowhere, there was a pylon lying on the street. I did try to dodge it, but I kind of swiped it (not bad though). Real shame.
What do we (I) learn from this? Don’t fiddle with the radio, and if it happens again, stop and remove unnecessary obstacles from the street.

Back at home, I did spend some time (illegally) on Reddit. So now I gotta block this too. Also, I did answer my hinge match, but I don’t really know yet (we texted like 3 things – I’m massively coping).

Now I’m writing (to) you, and I’m about to brush my teeth, and then go to bed, as it’s already half past one.

That’s all for today. I’ll see you tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

Hello! Today, not that much happened. I had a hard time waking up -> go to university -> numeric lecture -> solving some exercises -> lunch (I ate with my classic group, except Lorenzo, whose birthday it was today, so he didn’t come :( ). -> afternoon some more exercises, but I didn’t really wanna do anything, so I spent maybe like 1 hour just sitting there, staring out of the window, and listening to music.

Once during this time, I did try to print my solved exercises, since we have to hand it in on paper. For this, I had to update my university-card. But when I put it into the machine, it crashed, so I had to make some calls in order to fix it, and get my card back lul. Turns out, I just had to unplug it and plugging it in again. Classic computer trick.

-> at 15:15 I had one more hour of lecture -> going home -> in the train just listen to some music -> at home solve some Sudokus -> dinner (mashed potato with some beef packed in bacon)

After dinner, I did text the person who (surprisingly) gave me a like. Also, she’s suspiciously good looking for someone who liked me. But she didn’t respond yet. Furthermore, it was the classic of sending the text, and then immediately knowing something better to write. Well – maybe we’ll see tomorrow.

Then, I spent some time on YouTube, and quickly checked, when I had to hand in the academic writing exercises. Turns out, it’s tomorrow morning, so I solved those just before.

Now that I’m done with them, I’m writing (to) you, and then I’m going to take a shower and then head to bed. It’s not too late, but that’s kinda perfect. So I’ll see you again tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

Hello! Today was a not that interesting day. In the morning, I had to read the paper, and then head to university. Today I’m gonna skip the paper, since it wasn’t really interesting. Just another approach to solve few-shot problems with llm’s.

After that seminar, I went back home and then didn’t really do anything. I mean, I solved some sudokus, and that’s about it.

In the evening, I had volleyball practice. Since some shenanigans with people, today’s practice was with a different team. I did drive there, broom broom. I also picked up another unc (who used to play with me but now plays in the third team) and Daniel.
Actually, I don’t really know why, but I was really nervous driving there. Doesn’t really make sense…

Practice was quite good. Especially, since we were 12 players. What a time to be alive. (To be honest though, it was a clear difference between my team (better) and the other one. So that was kinda annoying.)

After practice, in the shower, I shot some soap onto the unc, and told him, he has some soap still on him. Classic joke, you know. And then he took revenge. When I tried to wash the soap out of my head, he just put more and more on my head. So in the end, I was probably washing out my hair for 5 minutes. Was really funny though.

Then I drove back home, ate a little, and then tried again to solve the Sudoku (which I’m currently stuck on). Couldn’t solve it though. Now it’s already 00:30 and I’m too late to go to bed. But that’s what I’m gonna do right now.

That’s all for today. See you again tomorrow. Take care & Bye-Bye!

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Context: A player of my team forgot his ref-shirt (I don’t even know why he had it with him to be honest lol). So I took it back home. Then, I remembered, that my ex was a ref as well.
More context: In 3 days is my birthday. Last year, she did congratulate me, even though we weren’t dating anymore back then.
So just before, I did kinda think about her, and if she’s gonna congratulate me on my anniversary and shit. Actually the first time in a while that I did really think about her. But I think, this also fits, since the crush on Caroline is slowly dying out :( -> No new objective (w.r.t. dating) -> what the helly, think about old things